Now I understand. I used to wonder why bloggers write too much emotional details, exposing themselves to the world. Suddenly I know, it’s called life. At some point, you experience life so differently that the flux of emotions is so overwhelming it leaves you breathless. You feel like you have nothing and have nowhere to go, and only faith in a greater being more powerful than you survives your storm. You get back up, now knowing that you are just a part of someone’s masterplan. You always have a choice, but you bear every consequence of your decision. But confidently you stand, knowing you are provided with everything you’ll need to face all tribulations. Yes, you have what you need.
25 is such a turbulent time. Quarterlife crisis, as someone suggested. All around me, friends and family are suddenly facing life–changing crossroads that I (and they) never expected. Without warning, life isn’t just about me. The world is much bigger now, it’s no longer just you and me, it’s beyond us. Relationships fall apart, and new ones grow. Moments end, yet memories live on. Suddenly, we’re walking on unchartered paths with unsure confidence toughened by a past filled with success and tragedies. Without question, life really goes on. I know someday, we will all find the reason for every event in our lives.
Recent events in my life has showed me the beauty of friendship. Wonderful words of encouragement drowned me in a sea of comfort, with random friends sending messages through email, weblog comments and SMS. Knowing that others feel your pain is comforting, and having friends you can talk to, and listen to what you say (but not necessarily agree) helps a lot in releasing the flood of contradicting emotions that drown you. I couldn’t say it in any other way but simply, “thank you, I’ll treasure what you’ve done for me for the rest of my life.”
Mommy, happy birthday!